Something I've copied from a friend's for pleasure reading.



DICTIONARY FOR WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS

40-ish- 49
Adventurous- Slept with everyone
Athletic- No tits
Average looking- Ugly
Beautiful- Pathological liar
Contagious Smile- Does a lot of pills
Emotionally secure- On medication
Feminist- Fat
Free spirit- Junkie
Friendship first- Former very *friendly* person
Fun- Annoying
New Age- Body hair in the wrong places
Open-minded- Desperate
Outgoing- Loud and Embarrassing
Passionate- Sloppy drunk
Professional- Bitch
Voluptuous- Very Fat
Large frame- Hugely Fat
Wants Soul mate- Stalker

WOMEN'S ENGLISH

Yes= No
No= Yes
Maybe= No
We need= I want
I am sorry= you'll be sorry
We need to talk= you're in trouble
Sure, go ahead= you better not
Do what you want= you will pay for this later
I am not upset= of course I am upset, you moron!
You're very attentive tonight= is sex all you ever think about?

MEN'S ENGLISH

I am hungry= I am hungry
I am sleepy= I am sleepy
I am tired= I am tired
Nice dress= Nice cleavage!
I love you= let's have sex now
I am bored= Do you want to have sex?
May I have this dance?= I'd like to have sex with you
Can I call you sometime?= I'd like to have sex with you
Do you want to go to a movie?= I'd like to have sex with you
Can I take you out to dinner?= I'd like to have sex with you
Those shoes don't go with that outfit = I'm gay

Bottom line is ...
All gurls are liars (hahaha, almost) and
All guys ever think of is SEX (almost true, all they ever want is to get the snake to know the kitty, kih kih kih)

9 comments:

Calv said...

interesting to see how ur relationship functions with these translations and meanings...hahaha so basically my other half gets bluffed a lot and all he cares is to bone u. lmao~~~

zewt said...

so how many times calv (the real calv) say 'i love you' to you? haha!

Calvin's Girl said...

hello Calv number 2 and Zewt, hehehe, well I kenot read his mind, and i dont know if he defines "i love you" as " i want sex right now".

You're both guys, so you tell me your dirtiest secret language... :)

Calv said...

well umm...

i love u = i think i love u...
i wanna have sex = shall we?

mwahaha

Calvin's Girl said...

hahahaha kuku lu ah... guys...

zewt said...

being kuku once in a while is good...

Calvin's Girl said...

LOL Zewt... yes i do think so, no kukuness no fun yeah? :)

Calv said...

no kukuness oso the girl wont get high. use wat to "poke" her leh?

Calvin's Girl said...

(=_+)" oh god... nvm i understand the situation ure in right now... LOL