The Wife, The Wasp & The Doctor

A husband and wife are on a nudist beach when suddenly a wasp buzzes into the wife's private part. Naturally enough, she panics. The husband is also quite shaken but manages to put a coat on her, pull up his shorts and carries her to the car. Then he makes a mad dash to the doctor.

The doctor, after examining her, says that the wasp is too far in to remove with forceps so he says to the husband that he will have to try and entice it out by putting honey on his p*enis and withdrawing as soon as he feels the wasp. And so the honey is smeared, but because of his wife's screaming and his frantic dash to the doctor and the general panic, he just can't rise to the occasion.

So the doctor says he'll perform the deed if the husband and wife don't object. Naturally both agree for fear the wasp will do any damage, so the doctor quickly undresses, smears the honey on and instantly gets an erection, at which time he begins to plug the wife. Only he doesn't stop and withdraw but continues with vigor.

The husband shouts, "What the hell's happening?"

To which the doctor replies, "Change of plan. I'm going to drown the little bastard!"

Why women are superior than men

We got off the Titanic first.
We can scare male bosses with mysterious gynecological disorder excuses.
When we buy a vibrator it is glamorous. When men buy a blow up doll it's pathetic.
Men's clothes make women look elfin and gorgeous. Men look like complete idiots in women's clothes.
We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers.
We've never lusted after a cartoon character or the central figure in a computer game.
Taxis stop for us.
Men die earlier, so we get to cash in on the life insurance.
We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing.
We know the Truth about whether or not size matters.
If we're not making enough money we can blame it on the glass ceiling.
It's possible to live our whole lives without ever taking a group shower.
No fashion faux pas we make could ever rival the male's Speedo.
We don't have to fart to amuse ourselves.
We never have to wonder if his orgasm was real.

Ways to tell someone their fly is unzipped!

1. "The cucumber has left the salad."
2. "Someone tore down the wall, and your Pink Floyd is hanging out."
3. "Your soldier ain't so unknown now."
4. "Quasimodo needs to go back in the tower and tend to his bells."
5. "Elvis Junior has LEFT the building!"
6. "Mini Me is making a break for the escape pod."
7. "You've got your fly set for Monica instead of Hillary."
8. "You've got a security breach at Los Pantaloons."
9. "I'm talking about Shaft, can you dig it?"
10. "Men are From Mars, women can see Your Penis”

*All Saturday Lame Jokes are sourced out from the internet.


pinksterz said...

evie i kenot talk to you d.

cenni told me dont talk to you because i will get corrupted mind soon :P

Fluffy~ said...

Waahhhh.. this is funniest!!! "The cucumber has left the salad."

Fluffy Life~

x said...

Saturday Lame Joke 2#

Posted at 1:11am 8 December 2007

Yr Reload of Rm1,000.00 is successful. Please check yr balance. Thank you

Nux V said...

LOL on the zip thingy!

Jason Phoon said...

what ? we LET women get off the Titanic first because we are considerate ! :P

Cazzy said...

"When we buy a vibrator it is glamorous. When men buy a blow up doll it's pathetic"

Hahahahaha! How true!

3POINT8 said...

Pinky! It's true!! You'll be corrupted immediately upon msn contact with evie!

iwan c.m.n. said...

"Silence..!!! I Kill You!!"

pendekarwanitabermatapanda said...

LOL @ the cucumber part.
Do ppl still use the XYZ as a code?
I wonder what Evie would say if she encounters this :P

Hor ny Ang Moh said...

I like the first wan! Wah! That doc have got many bullet kar?? Have a nice day!